Learning to be Human
by Nimphidelle
Summary: This is a collection of one-shots about Castiel trying to do human things.
1. Castiel vs the toaster

****Hello readers! This story is just going to be random one-shots of Castiel trying to do regular, mundane things in humorous ways. I hope you like it!****

"Dean?"

"Yeah Cas?"

"You said to make toast I need to push down on the lever. But every time I do it pops back up."

"Is the toaster plugged in?"

"Does it need to be?"

"Yes it does. Just follow the black cord until you come to the end and stick it in the outlet then try the toaster."

"Ok. It stayed down. Now what?"

"Wait until the it pops up."

Five minutes later Dean heard the shrill ding of the toaster followed by loud crashes. Sprinting into the kitchen Dean held back all but a few chuckles. Cas was sitting on the ground, the pile of previously stacked bowls and pans littering the ground and one sitting on his head. He was staring accusingly at the toaster. Upon hearing Dean chuckle he turned to look at him.

"What happened Cas?" Dean asked as he reached down and helped Cas up.

"I think your toaster is possessed. It let out a shriek before throwing toast at me." Cas answered, eyeing the toaster warily.

"It's not possessed Cas. The toast is supposed to pop out but the spring is broken so it does sometimes pop into the air. And the shriek was just the dinger making sure you know when the toast is done."

"I still think its possessed." Cas said, scowling petulantly.

"Maybe it is. Anyways, you should eat your toast before it gets cold."

The day after that the toaster mysteriously turned into a pile of ashes and in the weeks following the Winchesters would find copious amounts of salt in the other appliances.


	2. The Snowball Fight

**The snowball fight**

The Winchesters has just finished up a case in Colorado and were relaxing in their motel room, watching some kids across the street having a snowball fight. A sudden flurry of wings had them glancing behind them to see Castiel standing there.

"Hey Cas. What's up?" Dean asked, turning to face his friend.

"A lot of things."

"Uh, I mean why are you here?" Dean explained once it became clear Castiel was not going to elaborate.

"I had some spare time and decided to come and see if you needed any assistance." Castiel replied.

"Well we just finished up a hunt so we don't need anything right now." Sam said, glancing out the window as an idea started forming.

"Want to have a snowball fight with us?" Sam asked, ignoring Dean's 'are you crazy?' look.

"What is a snowball fight?" Castiel asked, looking perplexed. Why did they want to fight each other?

Dean and Sam turned to Castiel with looks of shock and disbelief.

"Well that settles it. We are having a snowball fight." Ten minutes later saw the three outside, all wearing tuques and mittens.

"A snowball fight is where you make snowballs and throw them at other people." Dean explained.

"That doesn't sound nice. Why would you hit people with balls of snow?" Castiel asked.

"Because it's fun and you only hit people who are playing, so Sam and me. Understand Cas?" Dean asked, starting to make some snowballs. Castiel copied what the brothers were doing and soon had a pile of snowballs.

"Go!" Sam yelled before ducking as Dean fired a barrage of snowballs at him. Castiel watched in confusion as the brothers laughed as they ducked behind trees and occasionally got hit. He looked down confused as he felt a snowball hit his chest.

"What are you waiting for Cas? Start throwing!" Dean called. Castiel picked up a snowball and looked at it speculatively before throwing it at Dean, who ducked under it.

"That's the spirit Cas! Keep going!" It took Cas getting hit three more times(two of those being face hits) before he was actively participating without being prompted. It soon turned into a three way wrestling match. Castiel kept to human strength to keep it fair and soon ended up on the bottom of a dog pile. They stayed out until night started to fall. When they went in they were wet, tired and happy. All three had smiles on their faces as the flopped down onto the beds in the motel room.

"So did you like your first snowball fight?" Sam asked, peeling off his wet mittens.

"Yes. It was quite amusing. It is something we should do again sometime. Thank you for sharing this human custom with me."

"No problem Cas. Anytime you want to have one just pop in." Dean said.

"I think I will. Goodbye Dean, Sam." With that Castiel flew away.

"Wonder if he'll really pop in?" Sam asked. Dean shrugged.

**That August**

"Hello Dean."

"Personal space Cas?"

"Sorry." Cas said taking a couple steps back.

"What's up Cas?" Sam asked, walking into the motel room.

"You said to pop in if I desired to have a snowball fight." Sam and Dean paused for a moment then burst out laughing. Castiel looked perplexed.

"Did I say something wrong?"


End file.
